Find Me – Chapter 18

Steve drove the short distance from Blondie’s back to his apartment where they needed to kill time before showing back up at the loft to break the news to Jack.  Kayla saw the ache of mourning on her husband’s face and reached out caress it, brushing away his tears.  The subject of Marcus had been a difficult one for Steve ever since his memories returned.  Kayla had had the opportunity to mourn him for many years, but Steve didn’t.  He came back to himself without his best friend, the man who grew up with him in the orphanage and whom he’d come to confide in and rely on like no other.

What Kayla didn’t realize was that Steve was battling not only the loss staring him in the face, but the fact that Steve allowed himself to lose focus of where Kayla was at a crucial moment in this jump.  The jump could have easily happened in that time, and he didn’t stay focused.

“I wasn’t prepared to see Marcus, Sweetness.  I just …”  Kayla reached out for his hand.  “… it was like I really was seeing a ghost.”

“I know.”  She brought the back of his hand to her lips and then to her own cheek.  “I know how much you miss him.”

 “This won’t be the last time, Kayla,” he said, his tone serious.  “We’re gonna run into more people on these jumps that are dead now.”

“You’re right,” Kayla said.  “We’re just going to have to take it as it comes, I guess.  You did the best you could seeing Marcus, and so did I.”  Steve let out a pfft.  “Steve, how were we supposed to react?  Do you think I would have kept it together if it were my pop?  Her voice cracked.  “We’re only human.  I remember when I saw John for the first time after we all thought he was Roman. I was overwhelmed that I got my brother back.  That’s kind of how I felt here, I got Marcus back.  For as long as we’re here, that is.  It must have been that much harder for you,” she said meaningfully. 

They’d arrived at the apartment by now, and Steve turned off the ignition and turned to her in his seat.  “Kayla, that’s the problem.  It was harder for me.  I was so engrossed in it all that I forgot that I was supposed to be keeping an eye on you.  Wasn’t that the whole point?  What if we see him again? Or someone else that gets me,” he paused and adjusted his patch, “like this?”  What if while I’m payin’ attention to them I lose track of you?”  He held his wife’s face in his hand, and she felt the anxiety in his touch.  “This jumping is doing something to me, baby.  I can’t keep my emotions under control.”

“You’re human.”  She turned her face into his palm and kissed it.  Then she held onto it with both of hers and brought it to her heart.  “You’re allowed to give away some of your attention.  You’re allowed to feel.  We both are.” 

Steve looked into her eyes through his damp one and whispered, “God, I miss him.” 

“I know,” she said with as much love and support as she could give.

Steve closed the basement apartment door behind them as he tried to shake off the heaviness he was feeling.  “Welcome home, Sweetness.”

Still at the top of the stairs, Kayla wrapped her arms around his neck.  “It is, you know.  My home is wherever you are.”

“Come here, baby,” he said almost forgetting that he was upset and gave her a soft, warm kiss that would have sent a charge though Kayla if she hadn’t become so completely exhausted. 

“I’m so tired,” she said, eyeing the bed and pining to be asleep in it as she rested her head on his chest.  Steve was just as tired as Kayla, and he was starving, too. 

“When do you think we last ate, ‘cause I don’t remember getting a meal since the house.”

Kayla thought about it. “You’re right,” she said.  

Steve sighed.  “Baby, we can’t sleep, we need to get to the loft.”

“Just a quick nap,” she asked pleadingly.

“How about dinner instead?  You know I can whip up a dinner in no time, here.”

“Can I take that “no time” to close my eyes?”

Steve laughed.  “I don’t think I have a choice, here, do I?  Alright, come on, baby,” he walked her down the stairs and sat her on the bed where she immediately plopped down on her side.

“Mm.  Good.”

“Yeah, I’ll bet it feels good. Wish I could lay there with you.”

“Smells good, too,” she smiled with closed eyes and a wide grin.

“I’m not cookin’ anything yet, baby.”

“The bed,” she said.  “Smells like you.”  She took a final deep breath and was out like a light right before his eyes.  Steve dragged his knuckles over her face then took the blanket from the chair and covered her with it.

Steve did the best he could with the food he had in the apartment.  It was a far cry from what he had at home and he felt homesick at the thought of it.  But he did enjoy poking around the place now that they had some time to kill here and really took stock of what was there.  For food, they were pretty much stuck with canned soup, which he added some cut up celery, rice, and spices to and put that on low so Kayla could get a little more time to her nap.  “Hey, baby,” he whispered to himself, “I found the tomatoes.”  He threw those into a couple of salads with the rest of the celery, and a cucumber.  He also made some toast.  She’s going to complain about the carbs.  “Oh well.”

While the soup heated, and his wife slept deeply, Steve went to the bathroom.  He listened to the pipes squeak, opened drawers, and went through the small collection of books he had.  Right away he opened the cookbook Kayla had given him for Christmas and read their poem.  He noticed how crisp and clean those pages were here and was a bit surprised, as they were a little worn back at home.  He tucked it under his arm and went back to the drawers.  When he saw the shoebox he opened it and smiled.  His toy train was there, along with the old photos.  Then ran his fingers over the old metal and thought about where that shoebox was now back at home; Kayla had kept it all those years. 

The smell of the soup shook him from his reverie, and he looked at the clock.  They really needed to get going pretty soon.  He hated to do it, but it was time to wake Kayla; 30 minutes was really all he felt safe giving her, though he really needed 30 minutes of shuteye, himself.  He gave the soup a final stir and turned off the heat before sitting beside his wife and gently waking her.

“Hey baby,” Steve said when she opened her eyes.

For a moment, Kayla didn’t know where she was.  But then she looked up into the young and handsome face of her husband and smiled.  “Hey.”

“You looked so peaceful sleepin’ there, Sweetness, but we’ve gotta get movin’ soon.” 

She forced herself to sit up in bed and try to wake up.  Part of her wanted to just stay there; if everything was going to reset, what did it matter?  But she was worried about how long they’d be there and knew they were going to have to just do this. 

The smell wafting over from the hotplate woke her up more fully.  “What did you make us?” she asked and licked her lips.

Steve caught that unconscious gesture that always caused his arousal to stir and reached a hand over to rub her thigh.

“It’s not much, but it’ll work.  Soup, salad, and toast.”

“Toast?”

“Sorry, all out of breadsticks.  We need energy, Sweetness.”  

Steve rubbing her thigh caused another kind of hunger in her belly.  Steve saw that hunger flicker in her eyes and unwillingly removed his hand from her thigh.

“Nope!” he stood up fast.  “No, we have to eat food now, baby.  Food.”

“Remember my favorite food, Steve?”

“Are you tryin’ to kill me?”  He roughly pulled out the chair of the table across from the bed, the drag echoing loudly in the room.  “Now sit.  Here.  I’ll get our dinner.”

Kayla grinned with enjoyment at Steve’s reaction to her.  She loved how he always made her feel like she was what he wanted more than anything else.  She sat down just as he put the plates down in front of them, then he lifted his leg over the chair and sat down heavily.  “But, baby,” he said as he shifted to find a more comfortable position for the uncomfortable bulge in his jeans, “if we’re still here after we tell Jack, the first thing we’re going to do when we get back here is make love in that bed.”

Kayla gave him a very sexy smile as she lifted a spoonful of soup to her lips.  “I like the sound of that,” she said with promise in her voice.

Steve ate every bit of food on his plate in about five minutes.  Kayla realized how hungry she was at the first mouthful and followed suit a little more slowly.  Then she got up and brought the dishes to the sink.  When she came back she sat in Steve’s lap and kissed him.  “Thank you,” she said.

“Baby, I should make you soup more often.”

“For taking such good care of me all the time.  In every time.”

“Oh, baby.  You’re easy to take care of.”

Kayla dug under the front of Steve’s shirt, which he reacted to by hardening beneath her.  Kayla felt it right away and laughed, “Don’t start!  I’m in here for something else.” 

“What do you expect, baby, you’re making him squirm.”

She found what she was looking for and lifted the chain over her husband’s head.  “Make me an honest woman again, please, Mr. Johnson.”

“Oh, so that’s what you were digging for.  I’ll let you dig for something else later,” he said as he took the ring from her, undid the clasp on the chain and slipped her beloved solitaire on her finger again.  “I still do, Sweetness.”

“I still do, too,” she replied, then gave him a lingering kiss to his scarred cheek.  “We have to go, don’t we?”

“Don’t you think we should?”

“Yes,” she sighed. “I’m so happy right here at the moment that I don’t want to leave.”  She stood up and went to the sink to clean up the few dishes they’d used.  Steve watched her wash the dishes with her back to him.  It reminded him of their last night at home before they began jumping, and the homesick feeling rushed over him again. 

Steve went to his beautiful wife, put his arms around her from behind, and placed a kiss on her cheek.  “Come on, Sweetness, let’s get this over with.”

This time they drove the Bluesmobile over to the loft.  When they approached the building’s front door, a panicked feeling came over Kayla.  She looked to him with scared eyes, and Steve gathered her up into his arms and held her.  “It’s almost over, baby.  This is going to be quick.”

“Last … last time we did this, he’d already raped me.  Now he hasn’t, and … and I don’t really know what to say to him now.”  Kayla pulled away slightly to run a hand over her hair, which she knew was becoming a bit of a mess. 

“Well, that’s fine, ‘cause you’re not saying anything to him, I am.”

“You?” she said with surprise.  “He’s my—.“  She cut herself off before the word left her lips.

“You’d better not be saying what you’re about to say, Kayla.”  The look on his unsmiling face was stern and almost wounded.

“Steve …”

“Don’t you say it,” he hissed in an angry swell that had quickly overtaken him.  He advanced on Kayla with a look of green fire, slowly backing her up against the wall of the side of the building.

“Steve,” she put her hands on his chest, “I’m so sorry.  You know that’s not what I meant.”  The hurt in his eye upset her.  She’d hurt him.  The thought of her with any other man hurt him.

“But you almost said it, Kayla.  I don’t want you saying it!”  Now her back was up against the cold, hard brick of the building, their bodies just centimeters from touching.

“Calm down!” she said with her own fire.  “I know who I am, and I know who my husband is. Has always been since before we ever took a vow.”

“Kayla Johnson, that’s who you are, dammit!  Steve now pinned her against the brick with the weight of his body and crushed his lips down upon hers.  She whimpered with emotion and sexual need as his body pressed against hers.  “Kayla…” he lifted her leg up as he pressed his firm thigh against her center.  “Caroline…” his lips sucked on the tender flesh joining her shoulder and neck as she thrust her hips hard against him, “Johnson,” he pulled her back to him and kissed her with desperate possession.  

Kayla kissed him back with the same intensity.  She felt how much he needed her, and she wanted to let him have her.  She wanted to heal the hurt her words caused with the feeling of her vagina closed tightly around him.

He pulled his lips from her and held her face with a more gentle grasp. “Please,” he said softly.  Please don’t say it again.  Don’t think it.  I can’t take it.”

“I’m sorry, baby.  I’m sorry.”  Then her eyes burned her love into his before they turned to something sexy and reckless.  Kayla’s hands fell to Steve’s waistband and undid the button.

“What are you doing, Sweetness?” he singsonged as he looked around to make sure no one was watching them.  Even in the shadow of this side of the building, anyone could have driven up and parked their car. 

“I love you.  I’m sorry my words hurt you … again,” she said with a tear.  She reached her right hand into his jeans and stroked his naked erection, feeling the slippery fluid that had leaked from its tip. 

The feel of her thumb rubbing his cum around the head of his cock was like velvet. He had very little control at this point and wanted to come right away, but this was a dangerous place for them to be, and he fought like mad to keep his head.

“Baby, this is … ohhhh,” he moaned as she stroked him harder.  “Kayla, I don’t want you to stop.”

“Good, ‘cause I’m not going to.”  She held his gaze with lustful intensity.

In one move, he removed her hand from his pants, turned her, and then lifted her onto the ladder that led to the fire escape.  “Head to the roof, baby, I’m right behind you.”

Kayla’s need to satisfy her husband was intense, and she made her way to the roof that meant so much to them as fast as her legs could take her.  As soon as they arrived, Steve made a “shh” motion and looked down into the skylight. The loft looked empty.  He didn’t think Jack and Jo had arrived back yet.  Steve took her hand and led her quietly down the stairs into their bedroom.  Once inside, he peered down the spiral staircase and saw it was just as dark as their bedroom. 

Kayla was still looking at him like she was going to devour him, and though he didn’t think it was possible, his erection grew.  “We’re alone?” she asked, her breathing becoming more labored.

“We are, baby.”

With no further invitation, Kayla pushed Steve backwards onto the bed and crawled on top of him. Straddling his crotch with hers, she kissed him hard, raking her teeth across his bottom lip. Then she trailed her hot lips down his neck to his tattoo and bit the flesh of his chest before bathing it with her warm mouth.

“If we ever jump there, you stop that wedding to Jack, Steve.  Promise me.”

“I promise you,” he panted.  “I promise you that I’ll never let you marry him again.  And I promise you I’ll never leave you again. I’ll never let that happen again, Sweetness.  Never.”

“I’m sorry I almost said that.”

Kayla reached down and unzipped his jeans, then slid off of him to the floor on her knees and tugged them down.  Steve wiggled out of them and released his full erection that so desperately wanted to be inside of her.  She gently held his throbbing cock in her hands as he sat up.  Looking down at Kayla, her lips were so plump and her eyes so luminous when she looked back up at him. 

“You’re so beautiful,” Steve whispered.  “How could I have ever let you go?”

Kayla slowly shook her head and placed a finger to her lips. Then she licked them and took him into her mouth as far as he would go, running her tongue over him as she did.

“Oohh” Steve moaned loudly.  He selfishly held her head and guided it where he wanted it to go. He couldn’t help it, he was insane with the feel of her hot mouth around his throbbing cock.  “Baby, God, Kayla …”  He kept moaning and she kept sucking, and the sounds of his pleasure and taste of what leaked from the tip made her release a gush of her own aroused wetness. 

“I know you’re wet.  I wanna taste you, too.  Let me taste you.”  He tried pulling her up to straddle his face on the bed, but she stayed on her knees. 

“No.  This is about you, I want this right now to be about you.”

That’s when they heard the loft door open and the voices of Steve’s mother and brother sail up the stairs to their crestfallen ears.

Steve looked down at Kayla and grabbed her hands in his.  “What are we doing?!”

Kayla’s eyes grew big.  She got up and brushed herself off, then looked in the mirror and saw that her hair was beyond repair.  She threw big guilty-looking eyes at Steve and whispered, “I’m sorry.”

Steve smiled with disappointment that she thought she did something wrong.  “No, Sweetness,” he whispered, “don’t be sorry.  We can’t help it sometimes how much we love each other.”  Steve tucked his rapidly deflating penis back into his jeans then buttoned back up. 

Kayla placed a loving kiss on her husband’s cheek.  “Let’s just go down these stairs and tell him, Steve.  Jo is there, so we have a buffer.”

“A buffer?”

“He won’t do anything insane in front of her.”

Steve nodded.  “But I’m doing the talking.”

“Ok,” she agreed. “My husband will do the talking,” 

Steve took her hand and put it to his lips where he kissed it. “I love you, Sweetness.”

“I love—.“ She felt the tug in her belly so strongly that the queasy feeling didn’t wait till she’d left this body.  “—you, too … oh no.”

They grabbed each other and held on tight.

“Looks like neither one of us is doing the talking, Sweetness,” Steve said. 

The last thing Steve saw before the jump was their bed as the moonlight shone down upon it.  The next thing he saw was confusing, because he was positive he’d jumped, the need to vomit front and center.  But the bed was still there.  Only now Kayla was standing in front of it twirling something around over her head and shouting very loudly.

 “Baby?”  Steve said.  “You’re only half-dressed, there.  When are we?”

The shouting stopped immediately, and Kayla dropped the fabric this body had just been whipping around.  She looked at Steve through bewildered, glassy eyes.  “Wheh n’arewe?”  She looked around.  “I dunno, Big Boy, buh’look!  Same place!”  She immediately started laughing hysterically, then stopped just as suddenly as her gorge rose.  “Oh, I don’ feel good.  You nauseous?  I’m nauseous.”

Steve looked upon his wife and realized where he was pretty sure they’d landed.  He smiled, because she was about the most adorable thing he’d ever seen in his life, but he also cringed, because he knew they never made love in this time, and there was nothing he wanted more right now than to get inside of her and let himself explode with the orgasm he’d had pent up for what seemed like days.

“I know why yer grinnin’, baby,” she said.  “You wanna bone me.  I wanna bone you, too.  Buh … wait for the nauseous … the jump makes me sick … iss’gonna go away.”

Steve sighed heavily.  “Naw, baby, I think this time it’s gonna linger awhile.  Ya know why?”

“Why?” she said as she tried to reach for his cock. “’Cause you’re drunk, Sweetness.”

Read Chapter 19

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