The Brady family sat down for dinner at 6:00 PM in the dining room every night, and this night was no different. Steve had sat at this sensible table in this modestly furnished dining room in this solidly middle class (always struggling to stay just above the lower end of it) home in this blue collar, working class neighborhood a countless number of times. A few parts of the house had been redone after the fire that happened while he was away, so by 2009 there were a few changes. This dining room table, however, was exactly the same.
Shawn sat at the head of the table with Caroline to his right and Bo to his left. Steve was seated next to Bo, and Kayla was directly across from him next to her mother. This gave Steve the advantage of being able to look at her all night without needing an excuse why. On the other hand, this meant he had to work that much harder to act as normal as possible lest he come off as a complete and utter horndog.
There was, of course, enough food to feed an army. Steve had no idea how she did it, it’s not like Caroline had any advanced warning that Bo would be showing up, let alone bringing someone with him; yet between lunch and dinner she’d managed to cook up baked chicken, mashed potatoes, a tossed salad, chowder from downstairs, a broccoli dish of some kind, and a whole casserole of macaroni and cheese. That was while she worked with Shawn in the fish market. He figured Kayla must have had a hand in it, but he knew for a fact that she was spending most of her time studying. And he knew that because he’d been keeping a very mindful if distant watch over her from the moment he and Bo were ferried upstairs, relieved of their packs, and fed their obligatory clam chowder. Which Steve swallowed with absolute abandon it was so good.
Dinner was spent answering a series of questions that all three Brady’s hounded he and Bo with, and Steve was more than happy to answer them. For one thing, it helped keep him from staring at Kayla, which if he continued down that path in a constant state of scrutiny it would only serve to scare her away. For another thing, it allowed him to look at her every time she talked.
The questions flew across the table as the food flew into Steve’s mouth. It’s not that he was specifically hungry, but the taste of a meal prepared by his mother-in-law was nothing short of comfort food.
“Ye like my wife’s cookin’ do ye, Steven?”
“Yes, sir, I do,” Steve smiled. Always have. “Best chowder I’ve ever tasted.” It wasn’t a lie.
During the course of dinner, Steve couldn’t help but notice the two empty chairs. He thought possibly Kimberly was in Europe working as a prostitute, which they did not know yet, so he wasn’t sure what he should say. Then he remembered that just because none of them were strangers to him did not mean that he wasn’t a stranger to them; he could ask anything he wanted, what did he know? Still, he treaded lightly. The Brady’s liked him on sight, which was a brand new experience for him, and he wanted to keep it that way.
“Bo, where are your brother and other sister? Do they live nearby?”
“Don’t you remember I told you I was surprised I hadn’t run into Kimberly by now?”
“Oh right.” No.
“She’s in Europe,” Bo reminded him.
“I forgot.”
“Takin’ pictures of God-knows-what,” Shawn said.
“She’s pursuing her art, Pop, it’s her passion,” Kayla defended her sister.
It had been a long time since Steve had known Kim to do any photography. He’d completely forgotten that Savannah Wilder once sent him on a job to retrieve that film canister from her apartment when she was blind. Set off that whole mess chasing poor Melissa and her first husband. Steve hadn’t thought of that time in, literally, years. It felt like a lifetime ago. It was a lifetime ago.
Since then, Steve had never known Kim to take more than snapshots as long as he’d known her, but apparently, right now, that was her cover story, so he wasn’t about to out her. “Photographer?” Steve prompted.
“Yes,” Kayla said sitting up straight and sticking her chin out proudly while she stabbed a cheesy noodle. “You should see her photos, they’re amazing. She does all black and white.”
“All that money on fancy cameras, and you’d think she could afford a roll of color film every now and then,” Caroline shook her head.
“Mom, it’s not to save money!” Kayla insisted. “It’s because it’s artistic. It … well, it tells a story better, I think.”
“Kayla, I wish you’d eat more, you’re getting so thin.”
Kayla flushed knowing her size was referenced in front of the man whose own physique was rippling under the black t-shirt sitting right in front of her. She wasn’t sure why she cared about how she looked, suddenly, but she did.
“Mom, I just ate everything on my plate!” It was true, she had, Steve had seen each bite go in her mouth. It’s just that she hadn’t taken that much in the first place.
“Children are starving in Africa, Kayla, you barely took any of the chicken.”
Kayla rolled her eyes while also laughing good naturedly. Only she could have pulled that off.
“That’s ok, I ate her portion, Ma,” Bo said.
“And two additional ones of yer own, too,” Shawn said not without humor.
So, Kim would not be joining the household this week or any week in the near future. That left Roman, whom was all grown up now and Steve assumed was living in an apartment nearby. Only that wasn’t the case; Steve was shocked to hear that Roman was also in Europe, mourning the “loss” of his first wife, Anna. While Kim’s life he’d pieced together for himself, this time in Roman’s life was sketchy to him at best. He knew Carrie didn’t belong to Marlena, but he was really confused about her mother and the time Roman was married to her. But he appeared interested at the level sufficient for this conversation and filed away that Roman was not going to be making an appearance here, either. He found himself a little disappointed at that, actually; to get to know Roman before there was any weird Pawn sh*t to get over would have been refreshing.
He was drawn from reflecting on where the elder Brady siblings were by Caroline as she reached for the butter in front of her daughter’s plate. “I’ll tell you, Steve, I don’t know how I raised three children who each ran off to Europe. Thankfully the bug skipped this one,” she smiled appreciatively at Kayla.
Steve smiled appreciatively at her, too. Her very long hair falling so beautifully down over her shoulder to the center of her breasts, which he specifically did not look at.
“I’m just a homebody, I guess,” she chuckled. “I can’t imagine really leaving Salem.”
“Yeah, I know what you mean,” Steve said as their life played in his head.
“You do?” Bo asked with a little confusion.
“Yeah … I mean I can just understand enjoying your own home is all.”
Bo had taken that to mean that Steve wished he had a place to call home and felt badly for his friend while feeling fortunate for himself. Steve had really only meant to cover for the awkward statement that had no reasonable explanation as far as these four people were concerned.
“So where did you grow up, Steve?” Kayla asked as she let her fingers start playing absently with a curl at her shoulder.
“LA,” Steve said truthfully. “I haven’t been back in a long time.”
“So is yer family missin’ ya, then?” Shawn asked with concern.
“Would you like to call them, dear?” Caroline offered. “I’m sure your mother would want to hear your voice.”
She couldn’t have known what she was saying, but Caroline’s words fell heavily upon Steve’s heart, making him feel the burden of this insane time loop he was in. He tried to look casual and unaffected, but the truth was that Steve Johnson truly missed his mother. Sometimes a person just needs their parents, and with Caroline’s words, this was one of those times.
Crap, how’d we get here? Steve did not want to go down the orphanage road with them, but he couldn’t very well explain that his family was out there but that they weren’t due for another eight years or so. He thought fast, but this time those thoughts ended up in a big circle, and he wasn’t sure how to get himself out of the corner he’d just found a way to let Shawn and Caroline back him into.
For a moment, as he sat there trying to rein in his thoughts, he dropped his focus on Kayla, who was now looking upon him with kindness and warmth. She couldn’t tear herself away from his eyes. They were etched in a melancholy that he was trying to hide, but she saw it, and she found herself wondering what could have made him that sad when reminding him of his family. And then she understood. Somehow, she understood why Steve was visiting with her brother instead of going home.
“You don’t have any family, do you?” Kayla asked softly.
“Kayla!” Caroline chided. “That’s terribly rude!”
Steve’s eyes locked on to hers and searched for the woman he knew. He didn’t see her, but he did see her essence. Her kindness. Her genuine concern for the people around her. Because that’s who the Bradys were; they were nurturers, and they didn’t like seeing people in pain. No one more so than Kayla.
“No, it’s ok, Mrs. Brady,” he said softly. “Kayla’s right, I … don’t have any family. I spent my early years in an orphanage, and then I travelled around from place to place doing odd jobs before I joined the merchant marine. Been there ever since.
Kayla’s eyes continued to hold something like wonder, and it was she who now tried not to stare before his eyes found her again.
Shawn reached a strong hand to Bo’s upper arm and his wife’s hand, then he looked at Steve representing their united front. “You’re amongst friends, son. You’ve taken my boy under your wing, shown him a good day’s work, and kept him outta trouble, I’d bet, too.” If only he’d known the kind of trouble these two used to get in together he’d be changing his tune. “You make yerself at home right here, then.”
Where was this man when Steve met Kayla in 1986? Where was this kind soul that he’d come to care about like his own father when he was really meeting them for the first time? For a moment Steve felt cheated out of a life where he could have had this family so much sooner. But then he remembered exactly where Shawn Brady was in 1986. And 1987. And some of 1988. Shawn was watching his daughter date a man that looked every bit the part of the bonafide bad guy that he was. A man that had allowed his youngest son to get involved in the KGB. A man who ran with the seedy side of the riverfront. A man who’d shot a senator. A man who had dragged his daughter with stars in her eyes halfway across the country while running from the police. Twice. And a man who’d broken her heart not one time but two. But right now, in 1979, Steve wasn’t that man yet. He hadn’t become the bitter, angry person that his final experiences as a merchant marine had fomented in him. No wonder the Brady’s liked this version of him so much better. He liked himself much better this way, too. And he intended to stay this way for as long as they’d be here, which he assumed would be not too much longer.
“Thank you, Mr. Brady, for opening your home up to me.”
The atmosphere was thick in the room, until Bo finally lightened it up. “Careful what you wish for, Steve, you’ll end up with an apron and a cleaver if you’re not careful.”
Everyone laughed, and the sound of Kayla’s lit up both of Steve’s eyes. Kayla saw it, too. Finally he let her see the joy in his eyes when he looked at her; he couldn’t help it, the colors just continued to pop on her like sunbursts and blossoming fields.
After dinner the family scattered, and Steve was forced to find somewhere else to focus his attention as Kayla disappeared to … where did she go? he wondered. Bo wanted to go hit the bars, but Steve was feeling the fatigue by now. “Aren’t you exhausted, Bo, we’ve been up for like 18 hours, dude.”
“What are you, an old man?”
Yes. As a matter of fact, I am. “Nah, just ready to catch some Z’s, here. You do know we woke up in Europe with the rest of your brothers and sisters, right?”
“Ha ha, it’s just one of each, that’s enough.”
Bo had the energy of a 17-year-old, and Steve knew how much Bo wanted to spend time with him. He tried to act the part, but he missed Kayla so much that now that he was not just in the same zip code with her, but the very same house, he just wanted to be with her. Even if her awareness of their shared live wasn’t in her yet, she was still Kayla, and he’d take this early version for now. He just wanted to spend time with her, hear her voice, and feel her presence.
“Tell ya what, how about tomorrow we go out and you show me Salem. We can start first thing in the morning, while Kayla’s at class, and we can hit wherever you want to take me. Besides, you’re gonna collapse if you don’t get some rest. I’m tellin’ ya, it’s gonna hit you all at once, man.”
Bo still looked like a little boy who’d been told he couldn’t have another cookie but nodded his head and yawned as if on cue. “Ok, you win, even though I’m not tired. You really are an old man. I’m gonna start callin’ you Old Man.”
“If that’s what it’s gonna take to make you let me go to bed, then so be it, sh*thead.”
“No, you can’t have that one, I already use it!”
“Fine, bitch, you can have sh*thead.” This was fun.
Bo looked at Steve like he wasn’t all there. “Uh … really? You have a weird sense of humor, man.”
More creative navigation of anachronistic lexicon. Great. In 2009 that would have worked very well. Maybe even beeyotch. “What can I say, this is what happens when my brain shuts down.”
Bo finally relented and made sure Steve had everything he needed for his week-long stay in his brother’s old room. Which happened to share a Jack-and-Jill bathroom with Kayla. It was the best possible scenario short of being in her very bed while her 2009 head was in in her very body. Kim and Bo shared another one on the other side of the hall, and He remembered asking Kayla once a long time ago why the rooms weren’t arranged girl/girl and boy/boy. Turns out their parents were all about fairness. The two large bedrooms were on opposite sides of the hall, and the identical small bedrooms mirrored each of them on the other side of the shared bathrooms. So, the two oldest kids got the two biggest bedrooms. Kayla’s bedroom was just a little bit bigger than Bo’s, and that’s how the cookie crumbled.
Steve settled into Roman’s old room with an intense stab of melancholy. Just the other day he had put Joey down for a visit to Grandma’s in the crib that would be sitting in the corner where Roman’s desk now occupied. Steve stared longingly at the corner, imagining the crib. He could see it in his mind’s eye, like an overlay upon the desk, his son giggling at the mobile that hung above it. God, he missed his baby boy. His son. The look in his eye when he smiled at Steve’s goofy babble and how he’d rub his thumb over Joey’s foot while he nursed from Kayla’s breast. Not one time had they jumped to a more recent past where Joe had already existed. They’d seen baby Stephanie several times, and that allowed him to really be with her. But he hadn’t seen Joe in what had to be months now. Every time he started to think of him he’d look past it to the next thing on the buffet, because he knew it would hurt. Now, in Roman’s room that had just been Joe’s for an overnight stay while Kayla was in the hospital recovering from her gunshot wound, he couldn’t stop the pain from overtaking him. He swallowed down the sound that wanted to escape him, but he couldn’t stop the tear. Steve went to Roman’s desk and sat in the chair. He splayed his hands in a Y over the flat, woody surface of the desk and whispered out his son’s name. “Papa loves you, Joe.” Another tear escaped down Steve’s cheek. “Papa loves you so much. You just hang on.”
Steve forced himself to calm down. He wanted Kayla bad. Her presence. Her knowledge of who he was. Her comfort. He missed her so bad he could feel her arms around him and her finger tracing down his patch with love in her eye.
After a few moments, he finished unpacking and, in contrast, chuckled to himself at the baseball posters. “The Yankees, Roman? Dude, you’re not even here to yank my chain and you’re killin’ me.”
Steve didn’t have much he thought might be appropriate in this year at this time to wear to bed in the Brady household. Most of what he had looked alike. Black pants, black t-shirts, another black sweater, underwear, socks, and … sweatpants. “I hate these.” But he put them on, because he couldn’t very well go to bed in his underwear under Shawn Brady’s roof. It seemed like such a weird task; unpacking. He knew the house like the back of his hand, even if evidence of the ‘50’s and ‘60’s had long been replaced with the updated décor that he knew by the time he’d married Kayla, and unpacking for a “visit” was just plain weird.
Having brushed his teeth and looking with fascination, as he did quite often on this jump, at his whole and complete face, he now found himself drawn to the sliding door separating the bathroom from Kayla’s bedroom. When are you getting here, baby? God, I miss you so much. He put his ear up to the door, but it was quiet inside. He nearly opened the door to peek in at her, but decided that the best thing to do right now was simply go to sleep, because he really was exhausted. And what was he, anyway, a peeping tom? No, he would not be sliding that door open and stealing a look at the woman that was years away from being his wife.
His will was not strong, however, and he did it, anyway. Just a sliver.
She wasn’t there. Not that he would have gone in, but just knowing she was there sleeping in the next room, he could go to bed with the vision of her and take some comfort in that; he just wanted to be near her. Now that she wasn’t actually there, he woke way the heck up. Where’d you go, Sweetness?
Steve left the bathroom and went looking for Kayla. He didn’t have to look far, she was in the livingroom with two textbooks open. She was on the couch with her back against the arm and her legs spread out in front of her. One book was up on the pillow to her right, the other was on her lap. She was deep in thought as Steve approached her from behind. She wore a green flannel nightgown that went down to her knees, letting her bare calves show, and her toenails were painted pink. The nightgown fell slightly off her shoulder, revealing quite a bit of her collarbone and braless breasts, which stood straight up on their 18-year-old body. His vantage point gave him a direct view down the nightgown, and he felt somehow … wrong. He averted his eyes immediately and willed his penis to stay soft. He could not, however, control his vocal chords.
“You’re up late, Sweetness.”
Kayla jumped at the unexpected voice behind her and yelped softly.
“Sorry, baby, didn’t mean to startle you.” Steve said as he walked around to the other side of the couch.
“You shouldn’t sneak up on people,” she replied with a bit of irritation.
Steve knew how much she hated to be snuck up on like that. “Sorry, baby.” He was nervous again. He hated just how nervous he was around her.
Kayla’s face softened as she took a good look at him. His shirtless body was hard and muscular. She’d never seen a man like this before. Even her own brothers didn’t have bodies like this. Every abdominal muscle looked chiseled, his pectoral muscles were bare of any body hair (which her brothers had in abundance; they were a hairy family), and his eyes gleamed a deep sage green that, not for the first time, she could swear were searching her soul for something they thought she had.
Basically, Kayla was staring. Lips parted, eyes dewy, and staring at this Adonis in front of her who’d just called her Sweetness and baby in nearly the same breath.
And Steve noticed. He saw her looking at him with big, blue-eyed infatuation and realized with real joy that the girl that didn’t know they were married was drawn to him. In his own right, she was truly drawn to him. This is what it means to belong together, Sweetness. When you don’t even know yet that you do, and your souls just can’t stay away from each other.
“So, uh, you studying?” It was an effort for Steve to get the words out. Their souls had found each other, and now he just wanted her brain to join them.
“Ah, yeah,” Kayla said as she felt butterflies in her stomach. What was that? It felt like a crush. That couldn’t be. “I have a test in the morning, and I have such a hard time with the, ah, with the skeleton.”
Steve laughed, and Kayla watched his Adams apple bob up and down. “Yeah, well, I hear the foot bone’s connected to the leg bone, and the leg bone’s connected to the hip bone.”
“Aha,” Kayla said playing along, “only it’s not. The foot bone’s connected to a ton of little ankle bones, and then the leg bone’s connected to, believe it or not, another leg bone. Then you’ve got a few more bones yet before the hip bone makes an appearance.”
Kayla smiled, and Steve’s world leapt off the page. Tell me to sit down. Please tell me to sit down, baby, I’ve gotta be with you, I miss you so bad.
“Ya don’t say? And here I was tryin’ to make that whole tibia/fibula thing easier.”
“You know what a tibia and fibula are?” She was impressed and re-adjusted herself to fold her legs under herself in an obvious invitation for him to sit down with her. She grabbed a pillow and put it on top of her lap in modesty. Steve was infatuated with watching how this Kayla behaved with him.
“Sure I do,” Steve tried desperately not to beam as he sat on the other side of the couch mimicking her cross-legged posture. “I used to get them mixed up a lot.” Kayla laughed. “But I’m pretty good, now, got a little medicine under my belt.”
“You do?”
“Yeah, I know a nurse. Can’t help but pick stuff up when you spend a lot of time with them.”
Kayla’s face suddenly fell. “Oh.” Then she dropped her head and pretended to read the page she was on. “So what’s your girlfriend’s name?”
Kayla. “I don’t exactly have one at the moment.”
Now she perked back up a bit. “You don’t?”
“Not, uh …” He wanted so badly to hold her hand and tell her it’s her and to please remember him. “… Not really, no.”
Now Kayla tilted her head and squinted her eyes at him. Her hair moved in waves over her shoulders as she did. “What does ‘not really’ mean? You either have a girl or you don’t.”
Even then, she was quick. “It means there’s no girl right now.”
“Oh, right now. You have a girl in every port, don’t you?” she said as she rolled her eyes.
“’A girl in every port?’” he snorted. “Who taught you to talk like that, baby?”
Kayla watched him touch his fingers to his left eye then make a weird face as he abruptly stopped. He was so handsome. She’d say cute, but he wasn’t cute. Shawn Cassidy was cute. John Travolta was cute. Paul McCartney was very cute. But Steve had left cute way behind. No, Steve Johnson was … incredibly handsome. The most handsome man she’d ever seen.
Kayla never answered the question, so Steve tried to just put it to bed. “I don’t have any girls in any ports. No girl outside that front door, there,” he angled his eyes over her shoulder.
“Well, I-I-I was just wondering – I mean – you spent a lot of time with a nurse. I was just curious is all.” She was red as a summer strawberry, and despite the fact that the she would one day fall in love with him and become his wife, he was still surprised. And he loved it, too. Being with her felt so good. The only thing better would be if her consciousness jumped in. Until then, he had a girl with him that he believed was in the beginning stages of a crush.
“I’m related to the nurse,” Steve said with a bit of a grin.
“Oh! Great! I mean, it’s great that you’re related to a nurse.” Then the words sunk in, and Steve wanted to plant his palm on his forehead. He was digging a hole. “Wait, I thought you were an orph– I mean that you grew up without a family.”
“Yeah, that’s right …,” Steve said slowly as he stalled for time to think of something. “Same woman who taught me to cook.”
“You cook?”
“Haven’t lived ‘til you’ve eaten my chili.”
“Wow,” she said with a an impressed look set in her mouth. “I’d never have guessed that was your bag.”
The very ‘70’s expression sounded so cute out of her mouth. “Yeah,” he went on, “Not really blood relative. But she’s family.”
Kayla felt weird relief in that statement. “So, ah, so you know human anatomy?” she asked doubtfully.
“Enough,” he said non-committally.
“Oh, well … ya know, I’m sure you’re tired, that’s a long flight from Europe.”
“I’m kind of awake, actually. You want me to help you study for your test?”
Kayla smiled. “Really?”
“Sure, why not.” He held out his hand for a book to look at, and she plucked the one from the pillow on her lap and turned it around before placing it in front of him. Steve took it and said, “Ok, what are we lookin’ at here?”
“Tomorrow it’s the lower body. I have to know all the bones from the hip down. The hip bone is really hard. I have to know what every region is called.”
“I thought it was the tib fib that was giving you trouble.”
Kayla looked at him. “I didn’t say that.”
She was half right. She said it, but not to “him.” She said it to the phone company. He really was tired.
“I … I misunderstood. Ok, so I’ve got the picture here, but I actually know a lot of this without lookin’,”
“Even the hip bone?” She was shocked.
“I said most, baby. Need the cheat sheet.” Kayla’s foot was sticking out a bit, and he had to check himself before he reached out and pulled it into his lap. “Ok, let’s start at the bottom and work our way up. What are you piggies called?”
“Your piggies? I thought I was the only one who called them that. Bo makes fun of me.”
Oh, she’s so cute. “So, uh, phalanges,” he said as his thoughts drifted to kissing her. “Go.”
“Wait, you just said one for me, no cheating!”
Get a grip, dude! “Sor – sorry,” he smiled.
“Ok, foot’s easy. Phalanges, metatarsal-phalangeal joints, metatarsals, tarsal-metatarsal joints, cuneiforms …,” and she went on to name all of the bones up to the hip.
“Which is the big bone, the fibula or the tibia?”
Kayla bit her lip. “Tibia?”
“See, you’ve got this.”
Kayla crossed her arms in front of her. “No, it was a guess.”
“Aw, it’s easy to remember which is which, they call it a tib-fib when you break them both, and the tib is first ‘cause it’s bigger.”
“Really?”
Steve chuckled. “Actually, I have no idea if that’s true, but if it helps you remember that it’s the tibia that’s bigger, and the fibula that’s the non-weight-bearing, then does it matter?”
Kayla smiled and tilted her head. “Nope. It doesn’t.” And the truth was that Kayla was going to pass that test tomorrow and get the tibia and fibula right, not because of Steve’s trick to remember it, but because of the sound of his voice telling her.
After another 20 minutes going through the ridiculously complicated area of the hip bone, Steve was feeling the night upon them. He hated to do it, but he tore himself away and stood up off the couch. “Mr. Sandman is comin’ for me, Kayla, I think it’s time for me to pack it in.” It was one of the few times Steve had called her by her actual name. She liked it; it sounded like melted butter coming out of him.
“Hey, why did you come out here in the first place?” she asked suddenly remembering that earlier part of the conversation.
“Just needed a drink of water,” he lied.
“Oh, I’ll get it for you,” she offered.
When she stood up, her nightgown fell to a modest length at her knees, and Steve forced himself not to stare. It wasn’t sexual, it was purely the concept of Kayla belonging in his arms and him not being able to take her into them.
Kayla filled a glass with a mustard yellow daisy pattern with water from the tap and handed it to him. He took it, and their fingers touched. It was the first time either of them had actually touched since he’d arrived. He unmistakably felt something pass through them both, and he knew Kayla felt it, too. Her eyes flared, and they fell upon the spot of contact. Oh, baby. You feel me, I know you do.
If he wasn’t sure before, Steve was positive now. Kayla definitely had a crush on him. He could see it in her reaction to her fingers coming in contact with his, and he could see it in her eyes as he swallowed his water at the kitchen sink. And that gave him a thrill that he wasn’t sure belonged there. He wanted his Kayla back, but he was mesmerized by the fact that an earlier version of her was just as drawn to him as the one seven years from now would be.
“Thanks for the drink,” he said softly. “I think we should go to bed. To sleep,” he corrected quickly.
“Ok. Thank you for the help studying,” she said.
Steve nodded and smiled kindly at her. Then he forced himself to turn walk past her and head for his room. He got in bed and lay on his back staring up at a poster of Ernie Banks. “At least you had some taste back then,” he whispered out loud. Just then he saw the light pour in from the bathroom. He looked over, and Kayla was standing there with her lower half hidden behind his sliding door.
“Sorry,” she said softly. “I’m going close this.”
“Yeah, baby, go ahead.”
“Good night,” she said. And she kept her eye on him as she slowly slid it shut. He grinned when he heard the lock go.
“Smart girl,” he whispered again.
Then he watched the light under the door as shadows formed by her moving feet as she brushed her teeth and washed her face. He kept watching until she unlocked his door and shut off the light. He smiled as he rolled over in Roman’s bed. ‘Night, Sweetness. It was so quiet now, the house was asleep. And within seconds he was, too.
Friday morning Steve showered and dressed. He had one thing on his mind today while Kayla was at class. Look for money-making opportunities under the guise of Bo showing him around Salem. Bo had no idea that Steve wouldn’t be returning to re-up for the merchant marine, and Steve needed a source of income for he and Kayla. He didn’t know why he felt the need to line his pockets, this place was going to be as temporary as the last one. But it had been eight days, no sign of Kayla, and no jump. They’d had longer stays, but this was amongst the longer ones, and if it kept on like this then his money was not going to get him very far after his week with the Bradys, maybe one month’s rent in this time’s economy, and enough to pay a few bills. Of course, there was no cable here, no mobile carriers, no Internet to pay for, things were really pretty straight-forward. He didn’t want to look for a real job because he was likely to jump before he could even get paid. No, he needed cold, hard cash, pay for play.
So since he couldn’t follow Kayla to class without looking like a real creep, he decided to use the outing with Bo to scope out Salem and see where he could make a quick buck.
When Steve arrived in the kitchen, Bo and Kayla were at the table, and Shawn was freshly showered from his morning catch and drinking a cup of coffee. Kayla’s eyes lit up when Steve walked in, and her father noticed when she stood up and said good morning to him.
“Hey, sleepyhead,” Bo ribbed his friend, “thought you were gonna sleep the day away. It’s already after eight in the morning, you’re late for duty!”
Taking a quick look at Steve, Shawn saw that the young man’s eyes had settled on Kayla and lit up every bit as much as hers did, and he wondered if one or both of them were in the midst of a little crush. He was quite pleased at the young man’s show of respect when he smiled at her but then quickly averted his eyes and addressed Bo.
“Bo, I haven’t slept in a day in my merchant marine life, sometimes a man needs his beauty sleep.”
Shawn laughed. “Early riser, are ye then?”
“Very, our shifts begin at 0600.”
“We’re lucky, Pop, usually newbies like me have to start graveyard, but Steve got me the regular day shift.”
“Did ya, now? How’d ya manage that, Steven?”
“I didn’t really do anything,” Steve said trying to back away humbly. He wasn’t here to take credit for anything, he just wanted to be with Kayla … with his family.
“Come on, Steve, you know that anything good I got on that ship you got me.”
Both Shawn and Kayla looked at Steve with different kinds of admiration in their eyes.
“Bo,” Steve said as he poured himself a cup of coffee.
“You’re in good with a First Mate or two, and you got me in your bunk with you, and you got me on your same duty roster so you could teach me what to do instead of letting me start at the very bottom scrubbing toilets. You’re a good friend, Steve.”
Steve hid behind his coffee cup and said quietly, “You’re a good friend, too.”
It didn’t get by Shawn that his daughter was staring. Nor that she was wearing those damnable low-slung jeans and a form-fitting sweater that showed the curves that she seemed to develop overnight about a year ago. It also didn’t get by him that Steve was being a very respectable young man right now, and he decided that his first impression of him was the right one.
“So, Steven, tell me, how old are ya?”
Steve almost laughed at this, the irony of it just absurd. “23, sir,” he said, and it occurred to him how much older than 18 that was and chose not to say that he’d be 24 in just a few weeks.
Kayla had sat back down, but at the mention of his age, her jaw dropped open. Steve changed the subject quickly. “Bo, where you taking me today? I wanna get a good look at this town you’ve told me so much about.”
“Oh, we’re gonna start her on the riverfront, I’ve got lots of hangouts you’re gonna love.”
Just then the doorbell rang, and Steve jumped. It was 8:00 AM, who was ringing the doorbell? Did they still have milkmen in 1979?
Kayla shot up and answered it. “Hey David, let me get my stuff.” David stayed outside the door just out of Steve’s eyeshot.
He was not happy. David? As in Banning? He knew Kayla had dated Julie Williams’s son for a short time, never slept with him, that wouldn’t happen until Chris. But he didn’t want her dating anyone, that was his wife standing there. He had a hard time controlling the expression on his face.
“Who – I mean, are you going to class this morning?”
“Yeah,” Kayla replied energetically as she put on a long red coat and slung her macramé bag over her shoulder that clearly held all her books. All that talk last night about if he had a girlfriend, and he didn’t even think to ask the same of her.
“Kay’s little boyfriend is here to walk her to class,” Bo joked. Steve’s jealousy bloomed.
“Bo, shut up,” she said. “He’s my friend, I can have friends who are boys.” Then she looked quickly at Steve, whose face she couldn’t read as he controlled his reaction. “Big test today,” then she smiled shyly. See ya later!” Then she disappeared out the door.
Now Steve allowed himself to show his feelings. He was not happy. But it was just a momentary weakness before he controlled himself and shifted his focus back to Bo.
Shawn smiled. The crush went both ways.
Bo and Steve spent the rest of the day seeing all of Salem and some of Brookville, too. Bo was so excited to have a day out with his friend, having lunch at a hot dog joint, and pointing out all the hang outs and things to see in Salem. Steve enjoyed it, too. He found several places he could conceivably make a few bucks short term, including the docks, which hadn’t changed from how things were done in 1985, either. Day laboring was still acceptable with a lot of working class people who made their home here. There was a seedy, transient element, too, though, so he looked for other options.
Later, Bo tried taking Steve to a dive bar where he knew he could get served, but what he really wanted to do was see if the Cheatin’ Heart was still a good bet to hustle pool. If it existed yet.
“Ya know, seen one of these places, seen ‘em all, we’ve been to plenty like this, you and me. How we try that Cheatin’ Heart place?”
“The Cheatin’ Heart? Across the pier? How do you know about the Cheatin’ Heart?”
So it did exist. Good. “I saw it from the taxi on the way over,” he lied. “Looked interesting.”
“Yeah, ok, sure.”
Bo wasn’t so sure at first, but it didn’t take long for Bo to be happy as a clam with that decision. He and Steve had a hell of a great time. The drinking age here was still 18, and they had no problem serving Bo, so they both kicked back a couple of beers, played several games of pool and darts, and laughed hysterically about everything they talked about. To Steve it was old times in more ways than one. If only Bo could have known how many times they sat here and shot pool and got drunk and laughed until their sides hurt. But to Bo these were newly formed memories that would help create the foundation for his adult life.
That’s when Bo brought up Britta again. “Miss her?”
Steve shot him a look as the door shut loudly with a new customer. “Not even a little bit, Bo, and neither do you.”
“Come on, man, that’s one foxy mama.”
“Bo, there are things I know about her. I don’t want you hooking up with her. Unless you want an assload of trouble on your hands, you’ll leave her ass alone.”
“What are you talkin’ about?”
“She runs in all the wrong crowds. Serious sh*t, Bo. We’re talking espionage.”
“What?”
“Bo, I care about you like my own brother. My very own brother, I’m not lyin’. I am done with Britta, she was using me to do dirty work for her and her people, and I know for a fact she wanted to try to get you to do the same. She’s into nasty, business, and she doesn’t care who she hurts. I’m never going to see her again, and you’re not either.” Bo didn’t know what to say, he was stunned. “Some people are beautiful on the outside but on the inside they’re black and ugly. That’s Britta. She uses her beauty to lure innocent men to do her bidding. Let her go, Bo. Just let her go.”
Bo saw from the look on Steve’s face that he was dead serious. She was pretty. But he trusted his friend. “Yeah, ok, man. Yeah.”
“You’re not going to go looking for Britta, then?”
“No, I won’t.”
“Promise me.”
“I said I wont.”
“Promise me,” he warned.
“Ok, I promise, man, I promise, jeez.”
That night the four Bradys and one Johnson met back up for dinner at the dining room table. It was Friday, so this time it was fish, rice, cauliflower, salad, and rolls. And more chowder. Steve hadn’t eaten this well in months. Seriously months. Even at home with Kayla and the kids they didn’t have these kinds of feasts. Steve shoveled it in, and there was more discussion of their day.
Bo went on and on about taking Steve around, and Caroline really glowed having her son so close to her. Steve and Kayla kept stealing glances at each other across the table. His jealousy was there beneath the surface, but his gaze was primarily that of a someone searching for something. It fascinated her how he looked at her. What was he looking for? There was something else there, too, she wasn’t sure what.
“How did you do on your test?” Steve asked Kayla when an opening presented itself.
“Oh, I aced it!” she said excitedly. She wanted to thank him for his help, but she stopped herself awkwardly. Something told her to keep their half-naked study session to herself. But he saw the thank you in her eyes.
“Of course, you aced it, dear, you’re a smart girl. Going to make a wonderful nurse.” Caroline was proud of her daughter, and Steve did marvel at how young his mother-in-law was here. Then it hit him like a ton of bricks. Caroline Brady was younger right now than Steve was in his own consciousness. He let out a breath of wow, and Caroline said, “are you alright, Steve?”
“Yeah,” he said caught off guard. “Yes, ma’am, just full. That was a wonderful meal, thank you so much.”
“Oh, you’re very welcome. You’re growing boys, need to eat!” Then she cast a glance at Kayla, clearly saying that she wished she’d do the same. Steve chuckled at that, because as he had last night, he watched everything that Kayla did at that table waiting for his Kayla to arrive, and she ate quite a bit more than he was used to seeing. “Children are starving in Africa.”
“So,” Steve couldn’t take it anymore, “David Banning goes to college with you?”
Kayla cocked her head to the side, her long hair becoming even longer on the right side. “Who?”
“David Banning. Your—boyfriend. From this morning?”
Kayla raised her eyebrows in confusion. “I don’t know who David Banning is. She looked to her mom, who shrugged, and Steve was confused. “Are you talking about my lab partner? His name is David Gold, not Banning. He walks me over to class Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays because our first class of the morning is our lab class. And like I said, he’s not my boyfriend,” and her eyes shot to Bo. “So lay off the boyfriend stuff, loser,” she said to him.
Steve exhaled the breath he didn’t know he was holding and tried to look non-plussed. “Oh, lab class. Sure, that sounds great.” He had no idea what he was saying or that he sounded really weird, he was just relieved that that guy was not her boyfriend.
“Besides, I really doubt I’m his type, I think he’s gay.”
“Kayla!” Caroline scolded and crossed herself. “We do not discuss these things at the table! Really!”
“Mom, it’s not a big deal. He honestly feels more like a girlfriend than a boy.”
“That’s enough, girl, yer upsetting yer mother.”
“What’s to be upset about, I don’t care if a man loves another man, why should that upset you, mom?”
Caroline stood up and started clearing dishes. “I don’t care what those people do, Kayla, I just don’t want to know about it at the dinner table.” Caroline disappeared into the kitchen, and Kayla rolled her eyes.
Shawn patted Kayla’s shoulder. “As long as they’re buyin’ my fish, darling, they’re alright by me.” Then he got up to follow his wife.
It was a truly captivating glimpse into how Kayla came to be Kayla. The ideals she’d set for herself, the way she was raised, and the attitudes around her. This was 1979, civil rights was still pretty new, and diversity of culture and orientation was in its infancy. Yet here was Kayla who’d already decided that diversity was more than fine with her, she had a friend that was probably gay, and from his name possibly Jewish, too, and she didn’t shy away from how she felt about it in front of her conservative parents. He felt himself falling in love with her all over again and wished she was there to do the same with him. God how he wanted to hold her, kiss her, and wrap his fingers through her hair. He wanted to smell her scent while she embraced him. He wanted to feel these breasts in his hands and kiss her neck and hear her say she loved him. His wife was right there, but he couldn’t have her. It consumed him.
There was nothing he wanted more right now than to stay home and talk more to Kayla, willing her consciousness into her. But he couldn’t put off Bo a second night in a row and put on the face of a man looking forward to a night out. Bo was out of his head happy. He called a couple old buddies from high school, and the four of them met up at a coffee shop in Brookville that definitely did not exist in 2009.
It was really interesting to meet Bo’s friends, both of whom were still in high school. More than that, Steve couldn’t deny that it was pretty awesome to be thought of as the cool one at the table. Both Bo’s friends listened intently to the escapades that Bo described for them and the things Steve had said and done with varying types of people and thought they were the coolest guys in the world. Steve was uncomfortable with some of the references to things he’d wished he’d never done when he was a young and stupid 23-year-old, but for the most part, Steve enjoyed both the memories and the admiration it evoked in his two buddies.
“You get a lot of action, Steve?” Ted asked. Ted was short, probably 5’5”, but what he lacked in height he made up for in muscularity. Steve was more fit right now than he’d probably ever been and was quite impressed with just how cut he was from these merchant marine days, that was undeniable. But Ted, who’d just turned 18, rivaled him with big, beefy deltoids and biceps. His long, curly hair was prime for some girl to wrap her fingers around it, which, clearly, he would have welcomed based on the horny stares he was giving a group of girls over to their right. “You meet a lot of hot chicks out at sea?”
“Oh, sure, there’s women everywhere. You’d have your pick, dude.”
“He has his pick now,” the other guy, Bart, said. Bart was much closer to Bo’s height, far lankier, with blonde hair that he tried to grow long but that just spiked out with the effort. The peach fuzz passing for a mustache above his lip was laughable, and Steve was grateful he’d passed this awkward age where you’re not a man and you’re not a boy, but you are horny all the time. “I don’t know how he does it, he’s shorter than all of ‘em, but they all wanna suck his dick.”
Ted jumped at the chance to rib the tall kid. “Aw, poor Bart can’t a girl to blow him. Isn’t he pathetic, Steve?” Bart punched Ted not that playfully in the huge deltoid that rightfully belonged on a linebacker, and Ted grabbed his balls in a responsive taunt back at his sexually frustrated friend. The three boys laughed hysterically, making the girls behind them giggle at whatever they were finding so very funny, and Steve joined in with what they assumed was equal gusto. In actuality, Steve didn’t find it that hysterically funny. Sexually frustrated at age 17? Thirty years ago he might have found this completely amusing, but now, he was picturing people like Jeremy Horton talking like this about Stephanie. A shadow crossed Steve’s face. He didn’t’ like these boys very much at all, not that he thought about it.
“Steve, that chick there is checkin’ you out,” Bo said.
Steve didn’t turn his head to look, because he couldn’t have cared less. In fact, these girls looked like they were 16 if they were a day, and all he heard in their chittering behind them was his daughter’s voice. “Naw, I think they’re wondering what this old guy is doin’ here with you three,” Steve tried to turn it around. But Ted and Bart protested, insisting it was him.
Very uncomfortable with this whole thing, Steve changed the subject and asked Bo’s friends about their final semester of school and what they planned to do after. This finally piqued their interest enough to forget the girls that – they were right – were falling all over themselves to get Steve to notice them.
Bart was a drummer for the high school marching band and had already gotten in to Indiana University where he planned to study business and spend every other waking moment in the IU drum corps. Ted, on the other hand, was a football star (well, that explained the muscles) and had gotten a scholarship to play for Notre Dame. That got Steve’s attention, and he suddenly studied the kid’s face to see if any hint of an NFL athlete he’d be familiar with was there. He dind’t look familiar, though, so he let the moment pass. Both boys filled Bo in on everything they were doing in school, their favorite and least favorite classes, and how they were just living for spring break right now. And their excitement was infectious after a while. Bo, however, Steve noticed, was withdrawing a little His heart not really being in the conversation at this point. He only wondered for a moment before it hit him. Bo had nothing in common with his friends anymore. He and Steve were images to admire for these boys now, not peers or equals that could really share anything with them. Steve thought he knew how to fix that and made a mental note to talk to him on the way home.
Steve was brought back to the conversation at Ted’s mention of Kayla. “Think she’d go with me to prom, Bo?”
“No,” Steve and Bo immediately replied in unison. Ted and Bart looked at them a little surprised at the intensity of the “no,” and Bo and Steve looked at each other in surprise that they’d replied like that at all.
“Neither of you oafs is dating my sister,” Bo said as he looked questioningly at Steve.
Sh*t. “I just – I think she has a boyfriend, right?” The gay guy? Bo’s face said without saying the words. “Wasn’t there a …” Steve went for a whole new tack. “She’s a little old for you guys. Brainy, too.”
“Yeah, brainy. And stacked! And have you seen those lips?!”
“Hey! That’s my sister, you assholes!”
“Oh, sit on it, Bo, I won’t touch her or nothin’.”
“I thought little sisters were off limits,” Bart said in genuine confusion. Steve thought sadly that this kid was gonna have to work really hard for a girl.
“She’s my big sister,” Bo corrected, “But she’s still off limits! Especially after what I know you two are after.”
“Hey, how’d I get involved, it’s Ted who wants to shove his dick in her mouth.”
“I’m sittin’ right here, Bart!” Bo started to lose his patience. “And I don’t want either of you dating my sister!”
The image of Kayla with either of these two idiots made him want to throw up. His heart beat hard, his stomach was in knots, and was suddenly burdened with the image of Ted showing up to her door in a bad ’70’s getup with a corsage in his hand and an anticipatory smile on his face.
Somehow Steve made it through the rest of the night without pummeling Bo’s stupid-ass friends or looking like an idiot. He did renew his worry, however, that his Kayla wasn’t here yet. Unless she’d jumped in while he was gone? Now Steve just wanted to get back home, check on her.
Bo was quiet on the way home. “What’s eatin’ at you, man?” Steve asked.
“Nothin’” he said. “Nothin’.”
“You suck at this lying sh*t.”
Bo shot him a look then relented. “I got nothin’ in common with those guys anymore. Prom? College? I can’t relate to any of that.”
Steve smiled inside. He knew Bo well, and he knew how to make Bo’s life better this time, too. “You want to go to prom?” He said it as a real question, not a judgmental one.
Bo shrugged. “I dunno. I hate monkey suits.”
“You wanna go to college?”
“Who’s gonna take me? My grades sucked.”
“There are ways to make that work. You could start with junior college.”
“It’s too late now, besides, the Alva’s waitin’ for me.”
“The Alva isn’t waiting for either of us until we sign on for the next 90. You’re 17 years old. You had yourself an adventure, and we had great times. Now I think you should go back to school.”
Bo looked at Steve like he’d grown a second head. “What are you talkin’ about, man? How am I supposed to do that? They’re all ahead of me now.”
“So what? So, you take an extra year, Maybe if you’re real lucky you make it all up by summer school and they let you walk across the stage in June anyway.”
“But … naw, man, I can’t leave those guys now.”
“Where, on the boat? Please, what have they done for you?”
“You’ve done everything for me! You’re my best friend!”
“Then you’re gonna miss me when you go back without me.”
By now they’d pulled up to the fish market and were parked. “What do you mean without you?”
“I mean I’m done with the merchant marines. I’ve been at it long enough, I have a little money (a real little), and I’m ready to stick to just one port for a while.”
“Where, Stockholm? I could see you when I’m in port.”
How thick can you be, Bo? “No, not Stockholm,” Steve laughed, “I was thinking a lot closer to home. Like maybe Salem.”
Bo gaped at him. “You’re kidding.”
“No, I like it here.”
“You’ve been here two days!”
“So? This is a great town, like you said, it’s got a great riverfront, I already have a friend here – my best friend – and I’ve been at it so much longer than you. It gets old.”
“Well … where are you gonna live?”
“Dunno. I’ll find a job and a place. Don’t worry, I won’t stay past our planned week. If that’s ok.”
“Don’t be stupid, you can stay as long as you like, my parents think you’re great. But … but I’m going back.”
Steve was shocked. That didn’t work? How did that not work? “Why?”
“I like the freedom. I like the girls.”
“You go back you’ll be scrubbing toilets.”
“Maybe they’ll give me the kitchen!”
“Chopping peppers till they’re teeny tiny cubes? Oh, enjoy that, Beauregard.”
“They’ll let me cook.”
“They’re not gonna let you cook, dude, they don’t let me cook!”
Steve could see on his face that Bo did want to come home. He did want to go back to school and relate to his old friends again. Steve just had to pull it out of him. So, he took out the trump card he knew would work.
“Look at what a great family you have, Bo. Have you looked at them? That mom and pop of yours? I’d have killed to get a pair of those. I’d have done anything, Bo.” And it surprised him that his eyes misted a little. He was laying it on thick for Bo, but he really meant what he was saying, too. He missed having a family so much growing up that living this one was affecting him. “Anything. And you’ve got it! You’ve got it, and you’re gonna throw it away for what? Adventure? Freedom? You’ve had it! You’ve got great memories, you didn’t get hurt or wind up dead. Now go back to school, go to your prom, and enjoy that best friend of yours in there.”
“Best friend? You?”
“Kayla. I can see how important you are to each other, she jumped into your arms when we got there yesterday, I thought she was gonna squeeze the life out of you. And you’re her hero. Today, right now, you walk on water for that girl. And I see how special she is to you, you won’t let her date your goon friends. How can you leave her? Come on, man, think about it.”
Bo sighed and went to get out of the car. Steve put a hand on his shoulder and made him face him again. “Think about it?” he implored one more time.
“Yeah, ok. I’ll think about it.”
It was after midnight when they got in, and the house was asleep. Steve was disappointed not to see Kayla on the couch like she was the night before, partly because he wanted to see her, but mainly because it meant she was still this time’s Kayla. Where the hell is she? Steve started to get very concerned.
Steve got in the blasted sweat pants, and when he went to the bathroom to brush his teeth, the sliding door to her room was ajar. It was dark in her room, but he froze, anyway. Could she see him looking toward her? Surely, she must be asleep, right? Maybe she’d jumped into her sleeping body … Quietly, Steve crept to the door and looked through it to the bedroom beyond. He could clearly see her sleeping form beneath the quilt, and while he couldn’t see her face, he was certain that she was sleeping.
Before he could stop himself, Steve soundlessly padded over to the side of her bed and looked upon the girl that was going to marry him nine years from now. She was so beautiful it took his breath away. The chair of her desk was just next to him, so he sat down in it. It creaked slight, and he held his breath, hoping she wouldn’t wake up and scream. When she didn’t move, he relaxed.
She laid on her back with one hand up near her face, fingers curled over. A picture of innocence. Her lips were gently closed, and her hair was up in a pony-tail while she slept. Her breasts fell flat against her chest, but their rise was unmistakable, even if her nipples were soft and supple against them. She really was beautiful, smart, and an unbelievable catch for any boy she would meet. And if that Ted guy ever thought about having her mouth on his dick well he’d have another thing coming.
Steve remembered the first time he watched her sleep like this. It was in Cleveland. Bastard, he always thought to himself when he thought of that time. If only Shawn knew that was the real you, he wouldn’t be thinking what a great head you had on your shoulders.
How he wanted to get in that bed and hold her. Sleep with her. It had been so long, he missed Kayla so much. Then he smiled at how this Kayla was looking at him this morning. She liked him. He could tell, she really did, she liked him. He smiled. It felt good to know that if they’d met all these years ago that – and a chill ran through him that shot out of all 20 of his fingers and toes combined. There was no if. It wasn’t if she had met him, she was meeting him. This was the real deal. This was what would have happened if a 23-year-old Steve had met an 18-year-old Kayla in 1979. He had advanced knowledge of her, but he didn’t have to wonder if he’d have been taken with her, he would. He would have fallen in love with her on sight. Period. But now he knew how she would have felt about him, too. Enamored. Immediately enamored.
“Oh, baby,” he whispered. It was too much. He had to touch her. He couldn’t but he had to. He settled for taking the ends of her pony-tailed hair in his finger tips, then leaning down to smell it. It did not smell like her, actually, but he loved it just the same. “Good night, Sweetness,” he barely whispered. “I love you.” He softly backed out of her room, closed her bathroom door, and then did the same with his and went to bed.